I Vote For Darkness
There were moments I can’t clearly grasp till this very day. Everything those stain as memories are evaporating slowly but certainly. Even for the most solid ones, they were being covered in some dark dust and mist.
Yes, I was one try to recall all those moment to present time, let them become clear one more time even in my mortal memory. It has been aged when I met that one, I was still playing with dust, grass and water on the unused rice fields with my other pals. I can’t remember how could I trapped for a while in that place, I guess it was on the far far away village (I mean very far from my usual childhood playground).
I was helping my pals flying some kites on a drying rice field. The weather was perfect so we could easily make all the kites danced on the sky. We were having a good time with some mangos ready to serve. Some kids seemed to be the local came after us, they had a plastic ball with them, certainly they would like to play soccer since the sun was about to set in a couple hours.
Fortunately, they invited us to play along, well…, nothing we can done because the we have done with the mangos and the kites already touched the white clouds – the cirrus. We played with a mixed man in both teams, so there would be no hesitation to get some bump or lump.
After some half and quarter hours, I got tired and took a rest beside a small irrigation canal, hmmm… the grass felt so soft. No longer than after me, more kids had take their break time (okay… I’m never get the cool part on any sport). Beside me, one stranger…, ups…, I mean one of the local kid took his seat on the grass.
“Ah…, what a play….” He talked while seemed to be gazing through the reddish sky.
“Pardon me…?” I was curious if he talked to me unintentionally.
He surprised and turned to me, “Oh…, no…, no…, I just glad to have a wonderful moment.”
“Yes, me too, it was a great moment.” I felt the same way for sure, what can I say more when we are kids have playing together on a playground even on a new place.
“You said ‘it was a great moment’…, that ‘it was’.”
“I see…, is there a matter…?”
He laughed and said, “No…, nothing matter, you were right, it was. And how about this moment, it is wonderful too or it isn’t?”
“It is wonderful.” I captured just moment to let my self knowing what I said, “what we are talking about?”
“This moment, this very moment is a happy moment right?” He again gazed onto the sky. “I and so maybe you already have so much of this kind of moments till this day, it shall not last forever. This moment are like our lights of happiness, lot… lot of lights, comes and goes, do you this these light a real ones?”
“It never last forever, yes since I do not know what a future is. But I can not reach what you mean by the real one?”
He smiled upon me, “Life so similar like a game or a drama, where we can play and become an actor. People love the moment where a drama turn into happy moment, and sad when a terrible scenario could not avoid upon them. So do I, love such a moment just like this one, I can fell the touch of the wind, the sound of water which flows in the canal behind us, the warmth of the sun, the voices of nature, this feeling is so unexplainable. But I know some how, I fall in love with this moment, or I may say that I afraid to lost it…”
“Right I get it, just go on…” Once he looked at me if I were listening those words.
“These lights just like a shadows that change and gone when other lights exist, or in otherwise they just gone without the other lights. My sister ever told me that there was a true light, which I do not need to search it everywhere, the light that shall not disappear when another lights exist nor a shadow that disappear without another light. People sometimes mixed it with myth and legend, and call it the eternal heaven.”
“Wow…, wait…, wait…, wait…, all those words now become so hard to swallow. Why that become so complicated. Maybe rhetorically yes. But how can a light exist without darkness?”
“Hmmm…, you talk deeply through it. One can’t know the light without knowing what is darkness, nor one could understand light without touching the darkness, if they are only names then they would never exist at all, the true learning is the very understanding itself.”
“…” I was in silence, I was not quite sure getting along.
For a while we let our view flow with nature. The Western horizon’s red color became darker than before. Some kids still on play ground for the second time.
A soft voice calling from behind us, the boy beside me turn his face.
“Sister…?!” He surprised by himself.
For a moment I was trapped on de’ javu like time.
“I now understand a little bit Sis, when we understand if both of the darkness and the light are one and the become nothing at all.”
That beautiful girl smile upon him, “That’s good, but only understanding it logically will give no help. Now you should move on the practically my dear.”
“Then I need to understand the darkness itself to the very root.” He said back to his sister, just like on a election, one would said, “I vote for darkness”.
She then turned his eyes on me, “Nice to meet you again here young one, thanks for whispering my little brother.” Her smile was like a petrified charm. “Now the sun will set soon, we must return home. I get a feeling we will met again someday, just like we used to be now.” Then they said good bye.
I though my self under the petrified charm. I just can not understand what was happening that time, nor got any meaning of it. “Why she seems to know me…?” My mind kept asking that simple question. Wait…, wasn’t she the mysterious girl from back there? I was remembering another moment in my life, which the stories I already told on “The Half Winged Butterfly”. Then what was she mean by “met again?”.
On the way home after a sunset, my pals asked me if I were okay.
“Why…?” I asked them.
“Nothing, just some of us noticed that you seemed talking by yourself back there.”
“Ah…, I’m fine… don’t worry.”
On my mind I would yelled, “Oh no…! Its happening again!”
Quote of the day:
I hate television. I hate it as much as I hate peanuts. But I can’t stop eating peanuts. – Orson Welles